Here I am... Alone... again... fiuhh...
I have nothing to do.. or actually I do, even many... but I pretend not to have one. haha..
I've chat with my best friend in Indo from a while, explored facebook until I am so BORED, browsed online-shops, did laundry, ate, watched so many videos in youtube, and finally I'm blogging now.
And I don't know what to do anymore... Sleep? Maybe it's a good idea but not now. Not sleepy yet.
Usually, I chat with my BF at this time because he is in Indo, so the time is basically different. It's 3 hours different for your information. hehe..

Yeah... But as I mentioned I'm alone now. Even since last week or maybe more, I felt this often. Why?
Because last week my BF was sick and not be able to online so I let him to sleep and have a rest. I don't want him got worse as well. It took a week for him to get himself well, I think.. I'm so happy that time because I can chat with him again. hohoho... Feel like kinda weird if I don't talk to him for even few days and of course miss him. hehehe... About 1 or 2 days after that, we got a serious conversation. It happened accidentally and he is the one who started it. I wouldn't tell what the conversation about because it's kind of privacy and I don't want him get mad of me because I share it in the Internet. hehehe... The point, I just want to share my feeling that time. I was so afraid and nervous. wakakakak... Was thinking about bad thing will happen to us and the topic was really danger. haha... We did talk so serious, we shared our feeling, what we want, what he wants, what I want, what we will be, and so on so on so on so on :)
But, I'm happy because after that it's all clear for him (oohh... it is him that confused and struggling about 'us' topic) :p
For me? I know this topic will be up someday but I don't expect it happened now means few days ago. hehehe...
but I'm happy because after that, we are still OK. hehe... Hope can be better tough.

The worst part is the day after, he had to vacuum from online again because he had to study for a test. He took Cisco training last month and will take the exam tomorrow. Arghhh... But, can't blame him tough. And I really give him 100% support for it even because of that I was alone again. haha..
And now, he is in another city in Indo to prepare for the test because the test is not available in his hometown. So, I was alone again... I feel something is missing because I don't talk to him much.
Is it called habit or what?? I can't imagine if I won't be able to talk to him someday because of certain reason like break-up? (amit amit). I will feel weird if it happens :(
This is also the reason why I was afraid when 'that' conversation happened.

Ohhh... You know what? Yesterday I went to airport to take one of my friend. He will go back to Indo for good. And... when I was in the airport I said to myself 'ahh... only-if I bring my passport so I can go back to Indo now.. Running from reality for a while and getting what I want and my happiness in Indo."
Crazy, huh? I think I am. hahaha...

Argghhhh...
Wish he was here so I can hug him...
Wish he can do his test tomorrow...
Wish him luck!
And wish he will come back to his hometown quickly so I can chat with him again... hahaha...

Kangen dia banget... huhu...